“These are drugs. Yes Aastha, I was into drugs after Maa, before you.” Aastha jerked her hands off when she heard the words.
He had finally opened his darkest secret to her. He felt relieved. Unburdened. Peaceful. He could finally muster all the courage and look at her eye to eye.
His eyes were tearful, ashamed of his past. Aastha could see that. He continued, “I just fell into the trap of drugs. Before I realised it, I was deep into the mess. I knew it but didn’t know the way out of it. That day, you remember, the day of accident, our first meeting..? If that would not have happened, I would have been lying here…. spent…. and I would never have been alive… or never really lived. That day, I found my reason to live.”
He looked deeply into her eyes. “Your eyes, your face, your smile, they gave me enough resolve to live again. I was a lost case but then I found myself in you. If I already knew that I had to come out of it, that day I knew why! You gave me life, Aastha, You are my faith, that I can be happy. I enrolled for a treatment as I enrolled for a course at VPS. It was difficult, I mean the resolve to stay away from the drugs, just like it was difficult not to come near to you.”
He paused here, his lips curving in a small smile, “And whenever my will power seemed to fail me, I would come to you for all those classes with you. Just a look at you and I would be firm again. You remember I attended every possible class with you? You were and would always be my solace, Aastha. I just could never explain my feelings to you. I was so much troubled by my past, I dreaded that if you found out about it, you would abandon me. And again I would be a lost case. That is why I just tried not to get your attention more than I deserved until that fateful day when you messaged me, Awake?”
He paused again. “You remember, I had to tell you, Yes, I am awake, finally, am awake… I have been asleep all this while, but now yes I am!” Once again a pause.
This time, seeing her intense stare, he dared to lift her hands and place on his chest near his heart. “If only I could tell you, what you mean to me. But guess I’d let my heartbeats speak.”
To be Continued in Part 22….